Hi there! Do you have trouble communicating? Issues getting your point across to friends, family and lovers? Can't figure out how to say all those awkward things you just need to get off of your chest, leading you to blurt them out at the most inappropriate moments, like that funeral that time, Brian? (You really shouldn't have shouted at the dead body. She couldn't hear you, she was dead.)
Well, I've got the answer for you!
Seriously though, I work with a lot of mental health professionals. They're all nuts, but good at what they do and give great advice. Through listening to many of them sound off on any given problem, I've developed this little technique. I've noticed that the biggest problem most people seem to have when communicating is getting that one awkward conversation out of the way.
So I offer you this strategy:
Open the conversation with, "we need to have an awkward conversation".
It's hard to do at first, being so direct, but it has numerous benefits.
First of all, you have to say that line, then give an indication of topic and timeframe. For example: "Hi, we need to have an awkward conversation about the dirty bathroom. It probably won't take more than 10 minutes."
This way, you let the person know exactly what they're in for. You're able to talk to them without getting them defensive, like they would if you just dropped the topic into some random conversation. Think about it, would you rather be blindsided or have a moment to think?
But don't think that this is some opening for getting a bunch of petty crap off of your chest. Stick to the topic unless it naturally goes somewhere else, and save anything else for another awkward conversation. Remember that you used the word "conversation", no yelling, no bickering, just discussing.
So give it a shot, you can blame me if it fails, but you really should blame yourself. If it's 2 reasonably rational people, then it shouldn't fail.
Unless you suck.
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